Milan Kundera’s Immortality posited, “Man reckons with immortality, and forgets to reckon with death.” His sentiment almost perfectly encapsulates the disposition inherent in the human condition for finding bliss in ignorance, but ironically forgets to account for innocence. TELAMIR The Immortal Bumpkin is the endearingly hysterical counterpoise of a man who reckons with death, and forgets to reckon with immortality. By introducing a much-needed laugh, the purposefully ‘intoxicating’ narrative coaxes a conversation with our discomforting universal truth.
Eschewed by humanity for as long as he can remember, Telamir is the village idiot in ancient Mesopotamia who unwittingly stumbled upon the fabled source of immortality before the dawn of civilization. The problem is he hasn’t realized he doesn’t age and won’t for another 4,000 years, after he’s unknowingly afflicted others who may not be as clueless… or as tenderhearted. Telamir’s odyssey through antiquity and realization to present day leaves him disillusioned after millennia of setbacks and losses, and he must hastily ‘get his shit together’ to confront the monster he’s created before there’s nothing left to save.
In this idiosyncratic, character-driven hybrid of Historical Fiction and Foolish Picaresque – think V. E. Schwab’s The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue meets Christopher Moore’s Lamb – a diverse ensemble drives the wildly original tale through a charming mix of farcical humor, sinister intrigue, and drop-kicks to the soul. The unassuming worldview peaks through without preaching, utilizing a blend of veritable science and magical realism to masterfully examine existentialism, intelligence, innocence & ignorance, and femininity. Featuring a rewarding format, TELAMIR enriches both story and character development through complimentary mediums of footnotes, anachronistic journal entries, and curated music.
TELAMIR The Immortal Bumpkin is a 120,000-word, completed manuscript for the adult commercial fiction market.